So there are occasionally these moments that sum up your experience in a place with a sort of poignant metaphor. Mine was in Hong Kong.
There is this organization called the Hong Kong American Center (HKAC) and they help the Fulbright program with resources and advice for the Fulbright grantees, professors, researchers, etc. They paid for us teaching in Macao (there are four of us) to go to Hong Kong and meet the HKAC and the US consulate staff...you know, just in case we end up in jail or something. We attended various seminars and briefings, basically drinking out of a firehouse for two days, but it ended with a team building retreat. The team building was typcial team building. A group of people who haven't quite figured out how much they dislike each other yet, are grouped together and made to do several tasks that have these little Aesop-eque lessons at the end. The only problem is that the group collectively decided that we were going to play dirty to win these team-building events and so the little morsels of wisdom were lost on us. Split into various two-person teams we very quickly, almost wantonly, turned on each other and the greater group cohesion melted away like snowflakes on the pavement. Antony, our Chinese team-building coach, had his work cut out for him. Here's a typical post-team-building exercise dialogue:
Antony:...OK, so maybe next time we should respect personal boundary, is this right? Focus on safety...
Group: [mumbles something about the rules..]
Carlos: So who won that plastic ball tossing game? My team did right?
Antony: oh, OK, so maybe that was not a game for winning, but for learning something about...
Carlos: Cut the crap, "Antony", tell us who won...who is better than who...
Antony: [puzzled look on his face] hmmmm...OK so maybe that ball game is not normally competitive...You were supposed to realize ball tossing is best done with all team together, play together, win together...supposed to realize no zero sum game...
Group: [collectively eye-rolls so hard it almost makes a noise...]
PIC: Here we are... group of adults in a prestigious State Department program...fighting over small plastic balls, ready to maim and scream...you know, team-building
That was poignant for different reasons, but the moment, the real moment that has summed up my experience in Macao/Hong Kong SAR was at the hotel. I was with friends in my hotel room at a posh hotel with excellent service and great views when I noticed my shirt had a loose button. I called down to the front desk and asked if they had a sewing kit. They said 'Yes' and that they would send someone up ASAP to deliver it. It was at this moment that I thought that maybe the language barrier wasn't significant and that this place is fairly live-able by a white devil like myself. I realize I could use some rubber bands as well, and so I call the front desk back:
Me: Hello? I ordered a sewing kit, room 1405?
Desk: Yes...it is coming sir, very soon...
Me: yeah, yeah, great, can I also get two rubber bands?
Desk:...
Me: uh...rubber bands? Hello...
Desk: uh..YES! Yes. two rubbah bands.
Me: [kind of surprised] Oh! Great, Thanks!
Desk: [whispering something inaudible in cantonese to someone off the phone] Excuse me, what is this?
Me: uh...Rubber bands?
Desk: yes sir, what is?
Me: uh...it's like a stretchy office supply, like to hold together pencils...
Desk: oh...tape?
Me: uh...no. No...that's tape...I'm talking about a rubber band, it is shaped like a loop, it is thin, it stretches...
Desk: oh! Yes, yes. room 1405.
Me: [incredulously] yes...
5 minutes later a bell hop shows up with a plate of fruit...an orange, an apple and a pear. The bell hop smiles and runs away as soon as I take the plate. My friend laughs hard at the site of the fruit and takes a picture.
I briefly consider that this is some kind of Cantonese message, maybe like a Sicilian mafia thing, you know, like three fruits of death or something. I call the front desk again...
Desk: Hello?
Me: hi! this is room 1405. I asked for a sewing kit...
Desk: yes. It will be there soon, sir.
Me: aha! yes, ok, somone came already...
Desk: Oh! good, anything else sir?
Me: um...yes, I received a plate of fruit...
Desk: yes...
Me:....uhhhh...yeah. Ok, so I asked for a sewing kit...
Desk: ohhhhh....ok. hmmmmm. 5 minutes, sir, it is on the way.
Me: So....no charge for the fruit...was this an accident?
Desk: oh, yes, maybe. NO charge fruit, sir. You get sewing kit soon, sorry.
Me: No problem-o, oh! and also maybe those rubber bands, yeah?
Desk: sure, ok.
Me: really? Rubber bands?
Desk: hmmmm...what is that?
Me: Oh! I just talked to you about this, those stretchy thin office supply things...
Desk: oh...yes. two of them?
Me: [now filled with doubt about the whole rubber band exchange]...uh....yes, please.
Desk: OK.
5 minutes later a different bell hop shows up at my door...with a sewing kit! AND rubber bands! haha! Yes!...the bell hop is startled by my sudden celebration and sheepishly runs away while a do a jig at the door. I just about start sewing my button back on my shirt and talking to my friend when I get another knock at the door...we look at each other and I inch towards the door. I open it. It's yet another bell hop [at this point I wonder how many they must have constantly squirreling up and down this place] and he's holding...wait for it...a ball of yarn with a pair of bright red scissors stuck in it! He holds it out and makes what I would call frighteningly profound eye contact. This ball of yarn might be quite an honor. I turn back into my room as the bell hop scampers away and I look at my friend and openly wonder if this isn't some sort of mob-hit warning, like there is someone downstairs desperately trying to tell me I am being targeted by the triads; "I don't get it! I tried to warn him, I sent him fruit, then a ball of yarn with red scissors stabbed into it..I mean, c'mon?! Red scissors! What kind of idiot just accepts those random objects?"
This guy.
Anyhow as I stared at what I realized was a random assortment of hotel items on my room's desk I realized that this is like my experience in Macao so far. I do eventually gets some of what I want when interacting with the people here, but occasionally cultural and linguistic barriers rear their ugly heads to create the splendid type of confusion that normally ends with me acquiring a bunch of useless crap just to get what I originally wanted. This is any one of many restaurant experiences or classroom exercises with my students or my visit to the clinic (that's a different blog...). This is me having the waiter order for me because my Chinese is so bad and just sitting there waiting for him to decide what I want. This is one of my students writing their one-page essay on a sheet of paper from their Hello Kitty diary because I didn't clarify that I wanted it written on size A4 paper and sans the kitty.
As I sat there and mediated on these objects I knew my fate. It was a perfect metaphor; If I wanted a sewing kit I would first have to get some fruit and yarn. That is how I would describe living and working in Macao. I hope you're hungry.
Macao-wabunga,
El Carlos
